Showing posts with label PS3. Show all posts
Showing posts with label PS3. Show all posts

Monday, April 3, 2017

Retro Games, Rotation, and the Gamer

- or -
 
A Question of Retro Games, 
Game Play Rotation Lists, 
& Modem Gamers


Well unless Angry Birds happens to be in his Game Play Rotation List that is!
The Most Dangerous Gamer (Comic)
by Nicole Wakelin on December 10, 2012
 

PREFACE


There has never been a better time to recover from lazy gamer syndrome or its counterpart - no-time-to-play-itus - than today.  Now.  Bear with me, all will become clear.  But first we begin the lesson... 
 
The Importance of Context

Contexts is wicked important.  So are ideas like “logic” or “expression” or even “thought” and “emotion” just to name a few.  One position on these matters can be found in the school of Epistemology -- which is the philosophical science and discipline under which we study and define how we know what we know - and the best was to both communicate and illustrate those points.

At its most basic of definitions “Epistemology” is defined as the study of the nature and scope of knowledge, as well as its justified belief and related systems that extend from there. Epistemology
analyzes the nature of knowledge -- and how it relates to similar notions such as truth, belief and justification -- and then defines those words and terms and their meaning in useful ways, so that we can thus carry on dialogue together.

The discipline also addresses our means of production of knowledge, and skepticism about different claims therein. I find this immensely appropriate and even poetic when I consider the alternate worlds that I have most recently existed in, and in particular that of the Japan and its northern-most island, Hokkaido, in the world of Hitman (2016), and the world that exists within the construct of the game “Thief” which was for all practical intentions, created in the late 1990s and refined in 2014 but depicts an industrial-age society on some alien world.

Sure, those are fictional worlds - or are they? I can tell you that at times they felt very real to me - and in particular the moral codes that appear to have usurped that of the courts and Common Law in them.

And the Darwinian approach to moral justification - something akin to Python Law rather than Common Law - when it comes to the significance of and importance for “getting even” or revenge - two themes that play significant roles in both of those manufactured worlds.

Despite the fact that humanity - let alone an individual citizen from one of the many different tribes that human call “nation-states” under which the species has been divided -- often and under conditions of grave danger seek that sort of satisfaction. I'm just saying.

To have meaningful exchanges about these - and other - topics we all need to agree on the basic foundation points like the actual meaning of phrases like “Retro Games,” or “Game Play Rotation List(s)” and even “Modern Gamer(s),” and what about “Preface?” That being so, for the record as I write this I am working from the following foundation points:

Retro Games = Any game that is older than the current season - but can be a very old game too.

Game Play Rotation List(s) = Any game title you play regularly but especially one you have yet to complete to your satisfaction.

Modern Gamer(s) = Me. You. Any gamer currently gaming even if they began their gaming career in the 1970s. As long as they are still gaming and doing it on modern hardware, they are a Modern Gamer.

Preface = The bits that come before the meat of the story.

See? That wasn't so difficult, now was it?

The Meat Part

Moore's law is an observation made by Gordon Moore back in the day that the number of transistors in a dense integrated circuit doubles approximately every two years. His observation turned out to be spot-on accurate, which is why they named it after him. It probably didn't hurt that Gordon Moore was also a co-founder of Fairchild Semiconductor and a little tech company called Intel.

The paper that Moore wrote and published in 1965 described the doubling - every year - in the number of components per integrated circuit, and projected that the rate of growth would continue for at least another decade - which turned out to be a very conservative time estimate, hindsight being 20/20 and all.

Borrowing from his experience I would like to introduce to you:

Boots-Faubert's Law

So yeah, this is the paper I am writing and publishing (well, article not so much as paper but still) that history will draw upon to phrase what will become known as Boots-Faubert's Law of Game Play Rotation - a simple law in gaming that dictates that the typical Game Play Rotation List for a gamer will double in size every 12 months as more games are added to the list thanks to two basic principles:

(1) The wizards at game studios continue to pump out games at a staggering rate, many of which are classified as “must-play” titles; and

(2) The average gamer will not have sufficient time in any given year to spend on completing these games, which will cause a backlog of incomplete games (and games they never got a chance to start playing in the first place) due to the lack of sufficient time to play them all.

The reasoning for this has to do with how big the video game industry has grown, and the fact that it continues to grow, with new studios appearing practically every day.

2014

A good example of this trend and its effect can be found in the year 2014. Bear in mind that a decade ago the typical gaming season - which runs from September through May - generally produced around six AAA titles in the “must-play” category, and so was certainly within reach of the typical gamer. Which was why we didn't really have Game Play Rotation Lists of the sort we have now back then.

Fast forward to 2014 however, and the situation has changed. Peruse this sampling of just the primary “must-play” titles for that year:
  1. 2014 FIFA World Cup Brazil
  2. Alien: Isolation
  3. Assassin's Creed Rogue
  4. Assassin's Creed Unity
  5. Batman: Arkham Origins Blackgate
  6. Borderlands: The Pre-Sequel!
  7. Bound by Flame
  8. Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare
  9. CastleStorm: Definitive Edition
  10. Castlevania: Lords of Shadow 2
  11. Chariot
  12. Child of Light
  13. Dark Souls II
  14. Defense Grid 2
  15. Destiny
  16. Diablo III: Ultimate Evil Edition
  17. Dragon Age: Inquisition
  18. Dragon Ball Z: Battle of Z
  19. EA Sports UFC
  20. The Elder Scrolls Online
  21. Elite: Dangerous
  22. Escape Dead Island
  23. The Evil Within
  24. Fable Anniversary
  25. Far Cry
  26. Fez
  27. FIFA 15
  28. Final Fantasy XIV: A Realm Reborn
  29. Forza Horizon 2
  30. Goat Simulator
  31. Grand Theft Auto Online
  32. Grand Theft Auto V
  33. Guacamelee! Super Turbo Championship Edition
  34. Halo: The Master Chief Collection
  35. Halo: Spartan Assault
  36. Hearthstone: Heroes of Warcraft
  37. How to Survive
  38. Infamous: First Light
  39. Infamous: Second Son
  40. The Last of Us: Left Behind
  41. LEGO Batman 3: Beyond Gotham
  42. LEGO: The Hobbit
  43. The LEGO Movie Videogame
  44. Lightning Returns: Final Fantasy XIII
  45. LittleBigPlanet 3
  46. Madden NFL 15
  47. Mario Kart 8
  48. Mario Golf: World Tour
  49. Metal Gear Solid V: Ground Zeroes
  50. Metro Redux
  51. Middle-earth: Shadow of Mordor
  52. Minecraft for X1 / PS4
  53. MLB 14: The Show
  54. NASCAR '14
  55. NBA 2K15
  56. Need for Speed Rivals: Complete Edition
  57. Persona 4 Arena Ultimax
  58. Pinball FX 2
  59. Plants vs. Zombies: Garden Warfare
  60. Pokémon Battle Trozei
  61. Pokémon Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire
  62. Risen 3: Titan Lords
  63. The Sims 4
  64. Skylanders: Trap Team
  65. Sleeping Dogs: Definitive Edition
  66. Sniper Elite III
  67. South Park: The Stick of Truth
  68. Sunset Overdrive
  69. Super Smash Bros. for Nintendo 3DS
  70. Terraria
  71. Thief
  72. Titanfall
  73. Tomb Raider: Definitive Edition
  74. Transformers: Rise of the Dark Spark
  75. Tropico 5
  76. Valiant Hearts: The Great War
  77. The Walking Dead
  78. Warriors Orochi 3 Ultimate
  79. Watch_Dogs
  80. The Wolf Among Us
  81. Wolfenstein: The New Order
  82. World of Tanks: Xbox 360 Edition
  83. World of Warcraft: Warlords of Draenor
  84. Worms Battlegrounds
  85. WWE 2K15
While not every gamer is going to like every genre - so there will be some selective removals depending on personal choice, the list above contains 85 games! And it does not help matters that some of those titles don't really include official endings - particularly the MMOs.

Sure I could have summarized that list - but then it would not have contained the gut-punching impact that the full list contains. And if you think that is a lot of games to be released in one year, consider the fact that that list only presents the AAA games - there are three times that number of lesser and niche titles released in 2014 as well.

This is why the average gamer's Game Play Rotation List is going to continue to grow with each passing season.

Another Problem

If you think that the paractical limits that usually apply - like only being able to afford X number of games in any given year - is helpful, consider this new problem: Microsoft has started GIVING games away for FREE to members of Xbox LIVE Gold.

Consider it - today when I checked the list of free Gold games - under the Game With Gold Program - I found the following titles:
Ryse: Son of Rome
Evolve Ultimate Edition
Darksiders

So there you have three more titles I want to play. I WANT to play mind you. But I guarantee you that I won't have the time to fully play them to my satisfaction, so as sure as Bob's Your Uncle those three titles will end up being added to my Game Play Rotation List.

What's the Solution, Kenneth?

I don't know about you lot, but the idea of my GPRL simply ballooning forever bothers me. There are loads of entertainment withering there just waiting for me to play!

Fortunately I have a solution. I say we set aside Sunday afternoon through early evening for ME time. Game Time. We dedicate ourselves to removing titles from our GPRLs by really digging into a game every Sunday. Set Sunday aside for gaming! Free the Games! YEAH!

Wednesday, January 1, 2014

. . . Secrets Inside of Secrets

This post was discovered hiding in the "Drafts" bin, having been started on 25 March 2013 and then never edited let alone finished since.  The long gap in time means I get to update this, so in place of the 2013 charity calender we get the 2014 calender...

There is a story behind this: Each New Year part of my New Year chores are to hang the new Ryan Air Charity Calender and then do a bit of New Year cleaning on my computers, Network-Accessible Storage systems, and the drawers of my desk.

The idea here is to start things off with as clean a slate as I can manage...

The annual charity calendar raises money for kid-centric causes!
By the way if the hanging of that calendar rubs you the wrong way, try to remember that the calendar is a project that is made with the enthusiastic participation of both the airline and the in-flight crews, specifically to benefit charity in the form of UK Teenage Cancer Trust.

The charity is the only licensed UK charity dedicated to improving the quality of life and survival chances for young people (aged 13 to 24) battling cancer.  Considering the dismal dole and post-hospital medical care system in the UK, those kids can really use the help.  

Last year's (2013) calendar benefited the TVN Foundation of Warsaw, Poland, who help children suffering from cystic fibrosis.  The 2014 calendar is limited to just 10K copies, and raises €100,000 which is used for precisely what they say it is used for - supporting young people battling cancer. It's all good in other words, so you should see if you can buy one today!

So with that in mind, and after dusting this one off and discovering it is worthy of completion (basically there are only two choices here - if the article is worthy of being completed and posted that is what happens, otherwise it is put out of its misery with mercy) here is the first revived posting from the Draft bin for 2014!

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The first Easter Egg for a home video console game is in 1978's Video Whizball for Fairchild's Channel F

Draft Bin Article:  Secrets Inside of Secrets

The hidden objects found in video games are called "Easter Eggs" but the reason -- the origins -- of this label and practice are  surprisingly something of a mystery despite the relatively young age of the practice.

One version of the origins has the practice stemming from a contest called The Easter Egg Hunt -- because they are small and concealed -- the idea being that they are similar to the Easter Eggs from the traditional Easter Egg Hunt.

These hunts are festival-like events usually held out-of-doors, to celebrate the Easter holiday,  wherein adults hide brightly colored chicken eggs for children to find.  Usually the kid who finds the most eggs wins a prize.

Another version has it that the concept of the Easter Egg in video games reflects the elaborate jeweled eggs created by Russian jeweler Carl Fabergé for the rulers of Russia -- Tsars Alexander III and Nicholas II -- as Easter gifts for their wives and mothers.

In a spot near Bedford Point, Staunton Island, in GTA III,  just past the area where it is very obvious you are not supposed to be able to reach, when you are persistent (and you use a taller vehicle-type) in order to jump over the blocked area, you can in fact reach -- and read -- the sign above, for this GTA-traditional Easter Egg.

Crafted from gems, jewels, and precious metals, the "eggs" usually contained, hidden within, a scene or other artistic secret -- with some being cleverly crafted puzzle-like eggs that you had to know the secret of in order to open them!  

It is estimated that just 52 of these special eggs were ever made, and as there are very detailed records for each that include the materials that went into them, when they were made, and as they are after all pieces of high art, the names that were given to each  as well as who their current owners and their locations are -- with the exception of eight of the eggs which have gone missing!  

The eight missing eggs are:
  • Hen with Sapphire Pendant -- gifted by Alexander III to Maria Feodorovna, Easter 1886.
  • Cherub with Chariot -- gifted by Alexander III to Maria Feodorovna, Easter 1888.
  • Nécessaire -- gifted by Alexander III to Maria Feodorovna, Easter 1889.
  • Alexander III Portraits -- gifted by Nicholas II to his mother, Empress Maria Feodorovna, Easter 1896.
  • Mauve -- gifted by Nicholas II to his mother, Empress Maria Feodorovna, Easter 1897
  • Empire Nephrite -- gifted by Nicholas II to his mother, Empress Maria Feodorovna, Easter 1902.
  • Royal Danish -- gifted by Nicholas II to his mother, Empress Maria Feodorovna, Easter 1903.
  • Alexander III Commemorative -- gifted by Nicholas II to his mother, Empress Maria Feodorovna, Easter 1909.
Interestingly enough there are actually two theories about these eggs and how they connect to the origins of the Easter Egg in video games...  

The first hypothesis is that it is the hidden treasure inside each Fabergé Egg is the reason for its use to describe the hidden objects or messages inside video games.  

The Memory of Azov Egg -- made in 1891 for Tsar Alexander III of Russia. The surprise contained within is a miniature replica of the Imperial Russian Navy cruiser Pamiat Azova (Memory of Azov), executed in red and yellow gold and platinum with small diamonds for windows, set on a piece of aquamarine representing the water.

There may be some traction for this one because, in fact, each of the eggs created by Fabergé actually did have a hidden treasure inside of them!  We will take the hidden treasures inside the missing eight eggs for our example here:
  • Hen with Sapphire Pendant -- a clockwork hen laying an emerald egg inside.
  • Cherub with Chariot -- a jeweled and working clock is contained inside the egg.
  • Nécessaire -- 13-piece diamond-encrusted gold woman's manicure set inside the egg.
  • Alexander III Portraits -- six miniatures of Emperor Alexander III on an ivory background inside.
  • Mauve -- a heart shaped photo frame that opened as a three-leaf clover with each leaf containing three miniature portraits of Nicholas II, his wife, the Empress Alexandra Fyodorovna, and their first child, Grand Duchess Olga Nikolaevna. It was made of rose-cut diamonds, strawberry red, green and white enamel, pearls and watercolour on ivory inside the egg.
  • Empire Nephrite -- a miniature gold bust of Alexander III inside the egg.
  • Royal Danish -- miniature portraits of Christian IX of Denmark and his wife, Louise of Hesse-Kassel (the parents of the Dowager Empress Maria Feodorovna) inside the egg.
  • Alexander III Commemorative -- a miniature gold bust of Alexander III inside the egg.
The second hypothesis is the eggs themselves being treasures, but that seems a bit weak to me.

As far as I am concerned, the first hypothesis combined with the fact that back in the day when these were actually being made for the Tsars they were not called Fabergé Eggs -- a label that is relatively recent being more descriptive than identifying.

These artistic treasures were in fact commonly known both inside the Romanov family, by the Fabergé company, by its artists, and with all of the references to them found in correspondence about and relating to them, as "Easter Eggs" -- it simply makes a lot more sense.

Every now and then a developing studio will get so clever with an Easter Egg -- and in this case an Easter Egg that they actually wanted the players to find -- that none of the players actually manages to find it on their own, even when they already know it is there to be found! This was the case with the Warden's Secret Room in Batman: Arkham Asylum - which the stdio ended up having to explain to the players how to reach it!
The Easter Eggs in Your Game

It seems that the game publishers have wised up to the nefarious tricks of the code-monkeys who make their games for them -- in fact they appear to be more aware of the practice today than they were in years past.

That new awareness has, in some ways, altered the way that they do business.  

Specifically it has caused not just publishers but game development studios to add Easter Egg clauses into employment contracts for software engineers and coders that, while not really outright forbidding the insertion of Easter Egg content in the games that these code-slingers work on, definitely influences the type of Easter Eggs they toy with.

Most code-monkeys will tell you that it is a hell of a lot easier to ask forgiveness than it is to ask permission -- which may be why, in recent years, Easter Eggs follow the much safer path of either honoring other video games, or paying homage to real-world people.

It is fair to say, in other words, that we are a lot more likely to see officially sanctioned Easter Eggs like Conan O'Brien's cameo in Halo 4 -- and a lot less likely to see secret levels like the Hot Coffee level that caused major controversy in the ability of publisher 2K Games to obtain the rating levels they were seeking for Grand Theft Auto IV...



The Original Easter Egg as a Symbol of Creator Credit...

The first officially recognized Easter Egg is widely held to be the secret signature hidden in Atari's 1979 video game Adventure by its chief programmer, Warren Robinett, whose insertion of his signature into the game was nothing short of a rather brilliant hack.

Bearing in mind that in 1979 the home video game industry was in its pre-infancy stage, and the video game studio phase that is today as a strong element of the structure of video game production.

Because of this, and because games were created as what is today known as "work product" -- which is to say that the artists and code-slingers who actually created the games both did not own a piece of the game, or share in its profits.

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Sometimes it is the very obvious that can trip you up when it comes to the discovery of Easter Eggs in video games - particularly when the Easter Egg is an object that you already know is there (or that it should be there) you just don't remember it! Such is the case with Jack's aeroplane in BioShock 2 (remember? The plane that he used to get to the city in the middle of the ocean from the first game?) Well here it is!

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What is more surprising is the fact that programmers were rarely ever officially acknowledged either in the advertising, the packaging, or even in the game itself, which did not include a credits screen as we are used to today.

Because of that and, it seems, out of a desire to sign his work much like an artist would sign their painting, Robinett created an interesting hack that lead to a secret room that the player could only really encounter if they already knew that it existed.

This had the effect of allowing the player to witness the words “Created by Warren Robinett” inside of the castle as an unofficial credits screen.  In effect Robinett had done something that he was contractually forbidden to do: he had signed his work.

If you have an interest in historical accuracy you may be surprised to learn that while Robinett's hack of Atari's Adventure, though it is widely thought (and said) to be the first Easter Egg in video games, was not actually the first such Easter Egg; it was simply the first Easter Egg that became common knowledge.

For whatever reason -- but probably because they wanted to keep their job -- the story behind the video game programmer who created the actual first Easter Egg was not revealed until some time in 2004, when it was widely outed in mainstream media, including an article in Forbes Magazine.



The first Easter Egg for Home Video Game Console gaming...

Video Whizball -- a game for the Fairchild Channel F home video game console, was engineered and manufactured by technology company Fairchild Semiconductor.

The Fairchild Channel F -- a console from the second generation of home video game consoles which include Atari's 2600, Magnevox's Odyssey, and Mattel's Intellivision, has a number of “firsts” associated with it.

It was the first programmable ROM cartridge-based video game console, the first console to use a microprocessor, and now it is the first home video game console to have a game with an Easter Egg thrown into the mix.

There are some other little-known firsts that also apply to the Channel F, which was originally launched as the Fairchild Video Entertainment System, or VCS (the name was changed to Channel F just a year after it was launched due to Atari using the same name, Video Entertainment System, to describe its 2600 line and later 5200 line) as it was the first modern cartridge-based home video game console to break the $200 price tag.

The VCS/Channel F sold for just $169.95 compared to the $200 for Atari's 2600 and Magnevox's Odyssey, $270 for the Atari 5200, and $299 for Mattel's Intellivision. To put that in more meaningful terms, that $200 from 1978 is worth $740 in 2014 dollars -- $300 in 1978 dollars is worth over $1,100 in today's money, so those consoles were NOT cheap!

The video game called Video Whizball was the game for Cartridge 20 of the Fairchild Channel F console's game library, and the software engineer who was responsible for creating Video Whizball, programmer Bradley Reid-Selth.

Thanks to investigative reporting by a number of sources we now know that code-slinger Bradley Reid-Selth is the first author of a video game Easter Egg -- fully a year before Warren Robinett slid his graffiti-like gesture of defiance past Atari's quality control stormtroopers -- having placed his surname into Video Whizball.

In GTA: San Andreas at the very top and highest point on the Gant Bridge -- which is the very obvious large red suspension bridge connecting Juniper Hollow and Palisades in San Fierro to Tierra Robada and Bayside the sign above can be found as what has become a sort of traditional Easter Egg in the GTA series.
Actually seeing that first Easter Egg requires a rather convoluted set of steps:

First the player must play against the computer, and win or lose kill the computer's opponent and then get killed themselves. Once that basic per-requistie is met, the player then must wait until both players are off the screen and then start a new game.

At that stage the player needs to select “GAME 43” and then “SCORE 67” and pull UP to start, at which point the non-existent program 43/67 loads, and the player sees “REID-SELTH” appear in the center of the screen.

And there you have it -- the first Easter Egg for home video game console play!

The Video Game Easter Egg...

It appears that the placement of secret Easter Eggs inside video games has been something of a tradition in the industry going way back -- but that really makes sense considering the nature of human beings and their rather unique (as far as we know) sense of humor...  

But then again what if that noise that dolphins make is not a language in which they are attempting to communicate with us, but is in reality the dolphins...  Laughing... At us?  I mean for all we know they see us as being just these hilarious thingies!

Anyway when you stop to consider that almost every game has a handful Easter Eggs -- and that handful in each game are just the ones we actually know about mind you -- it seems like there could be far more than we are aware of.

While funny or even meaningful messages in games as Easter Eggs tend to stand out in the memory of the gaming community, what about Easter Eggs that have a practical value?  Need an example?  how about the secret rooms in the relatively recent reboot of the Castle Wolfenstein game series: Wolfenstein 3D (for Xbox LIVE Arcade) -- which take the form of hidden rooms.  



A lot of hidden rooms.

Inside these hidden rooms can be found resources, special weapons, extra life tokens, full-healing-potions, or even simply a very large amount of ammunition conveniently placed near the site of a boss battle.  Some gamers would not consider those an Easter Egg at all, but rather a hidden element of game play resources...  But we are not "some gamers" and we do consider them to be Easter Eggs ni that they are certainly unexpected!  

Making Easter Eggs out of a room crucial to the success in a battle strikes us as an excellent use of the whole Easter Egg concept -- when a player knows it exists that is -- we're just saying...

Conan and Andy appear as union-card-carrying guards in the Shutdown Mission of Halo 4...
They Call Him CoCo

Then there are Easter Eggs that pay homage to real people...

The cameo-type Easter Egg appearance of late night Talk Show Host and Ginger Gamer Conan O'Brien (and his best mate and colleague Andy Richter) as a pair of dedicated and professional space marine guards in the instant classic and Must Have Game Halo 4...  

How much would you care to bet that the invitation to Conan by 343 Industries was equal shares of someone on the development team wanting to meet and interact with Conan, and part a nod towards the fact that Conan happens to be a major Halo fan?

Before we get to the meat and potatoes of his Halo Cameo, some gamer-like background is in order here, with our first logical question being did you know that Conan is a gamer?

We'll forgive you if you had the impression that, far from not being a gamer of any skill, Conan is what is known in impolite circles as a Newb?  Or is he?

It is very easy to get that impression when you judge him by what appears to be the public (if sincere) face of his gaming -- thanks in no small part to the large number of game reviews he has "written" and published via the official website for his television talk show.  We refer specifically to its section called "Clueless Gamer" with Conan O'Brien...

Actually the segment is created with Conan playing the funny man, and his long-time web producer and video games consultant-stuntman Aaron Bleyaert as his straight man. It should be noted that Bleyaert was actually part of Conan's team back when Conan was the host of the Tonight Show, which in dog years is like freaking for-ev-er.

(L34RL'/ (0|\|4|\|  has a bit more skill than he is trying to conceal.

The setup for his role as a clueless gamer really doesn't work if the viewer pays too close attention to what is actually happening in the games being "reviewed" but, nevertheless,  the joke-within-a-joke manages to succeed thanks in part to its name -- Clueless Gamer -- and the posturing set up for the show segment.



It is therefore very easy at first to dismiss him and his game reviews,  particularly if you fail to see through the humor present like his review of Grand Theft Auto V in the video embedded above.

Conan is naturally going for the laugh and like the other "reviews" in the Clueless Gamer section of his show's website he gets the laughs...

The fact that these are not really game reviews at all is easy to forget because Conan is actually a very funny man -- but even when he is trying to be funny without meaning to do so he reveals his familiarity with the games and their controls in instances like his jacking a car and ending up in a fistfight, and the skillful manner in which he "wrecks" his car.

But in reality Conan is actually not only a skilled gamer, but an often serious gamer.  Unlike the vast majority of his peers in Hollywood, in place of a "media room" and in-home movie theater, Conan has a very large screen display hooked up to which is a collection of video game consoles (pretty much one of everything) that is complimented by a very large collection of games.

Which brings us to Conan's Cameo Easter Egg appearance in the Must Have Game Halo 4...

If you still need proof that Conan is a gamer and much better at it than he suggests in the Clueless Gamer bits consider the over-all attention that her gives gaming both elsewhere in his show and, perhaps more to the point, in his real life...
  • Conan routinely includes video games as fodder for his monologue.
  •  Entertainment gossip show TMZ is rumored to have a team of cyberstalkers tracking down Conan's characters in World of Warcraft -- they are just looking for any character with red hair who actually uses punctuation and a Brookline accent...  According to TMZ MC Harvey Levin that criteria would positively ID the late night talk show host...
  • Investigative Reporter Arianna Stassinopoulou-Huffington, reveals in her August 9, 2013 article for high quality Internet newspaper The Huffington Post that O'Brien not only knows which of the Atari 2600's buttons turn the device on and off, but which buttons on the retro games console are used to reset the game, as well as where game cartridges are actually inserted...
  • Conan admits to CNN's Anderson Cooper that his motivation behind extending the Clueless Gamer feature beyond its original three-episodes to a regular feature on his show after he learned that video game publishers would send him free copies of their newest games for him to review.  Conan's reaction to the game publisher's offer is reported to be: "Free games?  I'm in!"
  • Conan routinely attends real-world gaming events because he is a gamer #1 -- Blizzcon '13.
  • Conan routinely attends real-world gaming events because he is a gamer #2 -- E3 2013.
  • Conan O'Brien moonlighted as video game characters including starring role in the Vatican's  Gabriel Knight: Sins of the Father in December 1993 (see screenshot below-left).

“The online version of Grand Theft Auto launched yesterday. That's right; the fictional, crime-ridden government of Los Santos is now functioning better than America's real government.”

2 October 2013 - Conan

How Important are Easter Eggs?

In terms of you average video game, the Easter Eggs that are found within them are not so much important as they are fun.  Fun to find, fun to share, just plain fun...  But sometimes in other classes of program they can be critically important -- particularly when the Easter Egg is actually a game!

To leave you with some warm and fuzzy feelings about the topic of Easter Eggs -- and to make it even more worth your while to have read through what turned out to be a very very long post even though it was heavily edited and lots of the stuff between "This post was discovered..." and "How Important are..." I thought I would dish you some of the more useful Google Easter Eggs while thanking you for taking the time and making the effort to read this post!

Important Google Easter Eggs
That's right, the search engine Google has some important Easter Eggs you need to be aware of!  And here they are, in no apparent order (note that all that you need to do is type the following into the Google Search Box unless otherwise noted):
  • Play the classic old-school video game Atari Breakout! 
    Load your browser, open the Google Page, then select "Images" from the top-right-menu and type "Atari Breakout" in the search box without the quotes.  If you are at work, be sure to mute the speakers on your computer, because if you don't everyone in the office will know you are playing Breakout.  Fair warning!
  • You Bet Your Life!
    Open Google and enter "Conway's Game of Life" into the Search Box (without the quotes) and Google will begin displaying Conway's version of the game Life!  Just sit back and watch it all happen - or not!
  • You Want Bacon with That?
    Open Google and type in "Conan O'Brien Bacon Number" (without the quotes) to see where our favorite gaming ginger late night host stands in his distance from Kevin Bacon!  Note that you can do that with pretty much anyone in the IMDB - or at least that has been our experience!  Not only will it tell you their Bacon Number (as in how many degrees they are from Kevin Bacon) it will also illustrate the number in terms of the steps!
  • Care to have an Anagram of Anagram?
    Open Google and type the following into the Search Box: "Anagram" (without the quotes) and you will get an Anagram of Anagram in the "Did You Mean?" Offer Line!  If you find that amusing, go to one of the bazillion Anagram Servers on the Interwebs and type in your name to see what you get for Anagrams!  Chris Boots-Faubert gets a very nice selection but my favorite is "A Boob Stitch Surfer"
  • A Quick Anti-Boredom Barrel Roll Shot in the Arm
    Open Google and, in the Search Box, type in "Do a barrel roll" (without the quotes) and you will find something to be amused about!  Take that, boredom!
  • Did You Order a Festivus Pole?
    Searching for "Festivus" (without the quotes) places a Festivus pole in the left side of the window.
  • The Answer is...
    Load Google and type in "the answer to life, the universe, and everything" (without the quotes) into the Search Box and you get the answer.
  • Time Travel from your Computer
    Open Google and, in the Search Box type in "Google in 1998" (without the quotes).  You will instantly be teleported to the year 1998, as suddenly you will be searching the web via that year's Google!
  • Zerg Rush Destruction Game
    Did you know that in video games a "Zerg Rush" is defined as an overwhelming attack by a large number of enemy forces?  Well, it is!  And if you open Google and type in the words "Zerg Rush" into the Search Box (minus the quotes) the display for that search term will be attacked by an overwhelming number of enemy Google O's!  You must defend your search results by rapidly clicking the left-mouse-button on the foes, defeating them!  How well did you do?  You can compare your score with the world!

Enjoy your Google Easter Eggs - what the heck, enjoy all Easter Eggs, everywhere, including Easter Easter Eggs!

Ciao!

C

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Hiding the Body in Dishonored

Due to a combination of circumstances that include ill-health and the fact that I never actually had the opportunity to fully play-through the video game Dishonored on my Xbox (I played it on PS3 when I did the review), and due to my curiosity about whether it would feel different on Xbox as opposed to PS3, I finally got around to playing Dishonored on my Xbox.

Being ill sucks.  That is not a gray-area issue.  Having a video game to play that you can really and truly immerse yourself in - and especially when that game has a good story line and interesting alternate play options - well, let me just say that when you are ill that sort of thing really can go a long way towards helping you get through your day.

The mask is about the story and the protagonist shifting from protector to avenger and assassin!

Gotta Hide the Body?

The way Dishonored is engineered, there are basically two ways you can play the game...

(1) As a stealth action-adventure title in which your primary goal is to be a literal ghost, not be seen at all, not set off any alarms, not kill anyone and not allow any of the bodies you incap to be discovered.

(2) Play it as a bloodbath adventure in which you go all out, killing everybody.

While it may seem like the latter would be the more difficult method, considering the huge number of enemies and potential targets in the game, it turns out that it is the former that is really the challenge.

I have a lot more respect for CIA wetwork agents now, particularly when I consider the potential issues that are associated with hiding bodies.

What I mean by that is that it is easy enough to not kill anyone - that is basically a choice you make - while it is slightly more difficult to not kill anyone AND not trigger any alarms or be seen not killing anyone, but not killing anyone while you are not seen not killing anyone and at the same time not setting off any alarms while AT THE SAME TIME finding places to hide the bodies so that none are discovered, well, that is hard.

I say it is hard EVEN while acknowledging the mechanism in the game that causes the previous bodies of the targets you have incapped past five to disappear (basically the game will only allow you to have five bodies in a zone at any one time, so each time you incap or kill a new one, the oldest body in your collection despawns).

Game play is surprisingly fluid and the game is largely bug-free.  But you expect that from Arkane.

Remember the Hitman Series?

The whole stealth action-adventure approach in Dishonored was not a real challenge until I reached the mission called "Return to the Tower" which was, let me tell you right now, a bitch.  Really really challenging.

In fact it was so challenging due to the random patrol pattern of non-combat NPC's who somehow kept stumbling upon incapped bodies and sounding alarms - even when those bodies were on the other side of walls, hidden in shadows - that I finally came to the realization that I was going to need to really hide the bodies well.

The solution I devised was to kill the pack of rats in the Torture Chamber after incapping the Wolfhound and Torturer, and then haul every body down there after I choked each out.  Granted there was never a huge stack of bodies due to the five-body limitation (in the Hitman games I would often end up with a HUGE stack of bodies), it was still close enough to the feeling that I used to get playing the Hitman games to give me pretty decent flashbacks to that series.

I should mention that I have always been a fan of the Hitman games - it being a game series that somehow took on a subject that IRL I would never go near, but due to the approach that was used in the game and its back story, really helped to define "entertainment" for that genre.

But getting back on the subject, if you happen to have played Dishonored AND you did the no-killing and no-alarms play through AND you managed to do the "Return to the Tower" mission without staking bodies in an out-of-the-way location, would you please email me and tell me how you did it?

I am particularly interested in hearing from you if you managed to do this level in full-on stealth mode by avoiding dealing with any (or very few) enemies.

Seriously, I couldn't figure out how to play that mission without clearing the enemies floor by floor, so it took me longer to complete that one mission than it did for me to do all of the previous missions combined.  Which was really odd when I thought about it later.

While the selection of enemy types is very narrow for this type of game and its genre, there is still plenty of challenge and variety to be found in Dishonored, which is one of only a handful of games to earn a perfect 10 out of 10 review score.

Achievements in Dishonored

One of the really cool aspects of the game was the collection of Achievements / Trophies that they devised for the game.

While the Achievements are not really divided into logical groups with respect to which set of goals you ended up choosing (either the no-kill / no-alarm approach, or the bloodbath approach) what I discovered was that they really do sort of split into three distinct groups: (1) the ones you will unlock during the no-kill / no-alarm play-through; (2) the ones you will unlock during the bloodbath style of play-through; and (3) the ones you had to go out of your way and do things you would not ordinarily do in order to unlock them sort.

Actually there is a 4th type but it does not really count, being as it is the small number that are part of the story and so will unlock no matter what method you chose to play...

If you are playing the game (or are contemplating playing and I really recommend you do play if you are looking for an immersive and fun stealth game that you can replay Rambo-style after you beat it all Ninja-Ghost style), I recommend the following Achievements / Trophies logical grouping:

Note: There are 70 Achievements worth a total of 1,420G for the Xbox 360 version of Dishonored, with 50 of them (worth 1000G) from the base game, and 20 (worth 420G) from the DLC.

Category I: Stealth Run Achievements
These include all of the Achievements that are unlocked as a natural consequence of playing through the stealth action play through.  There are 10 in total, worth 330G and when you add the 170G from the story-based automatic ones, you get a grand total of 500G, which appears to suggest based on the other numbers that the Stealth Play is really the intended method of play.
  1. Clean Hands (100G) You completed the game without killing anyone
  2. Faceless (20G) After escaping Coldridge Prison, you completed a mission without alerting anyone
  3. Ghost (30G) You completed all missions after the prologue, alerting or killing no one but key targets
  4. Just Dark Enough (50G) You completed the game in low chaos (S)
  5. Poetic Justice (30G) You neutralized all key targets using indirect means (S)
  6. Political Suicide (10G) You brought about the Lord Regent's fall from grace by broadcasting his crimes
  7. Shadow (30G) You completed all missions after the prologue without alerting anyone
  8. Specter (20G) After escaping prison, you completed a mission, not alerting anyone and killing less than 5 people
  9. Surgical (30G) You played from the first mission through Kaldwin's Bridge killing fewer than 10 characters
  10. Vanished (10G) You escaped prison and navigated the sewers undetected (S)
Category II: Bloodbath Run Achievements
These include all of the Achievements that are unlocked as a natural consequence of playing through the bloodbath (killing-action) play-through.  There are 4 in total, worth 80G and when you add the 170G from the story-based automatic ones, you get a grand total of 250G, which is like half of what you got on the Stealth play-through, and that appears to suggest that this is the secondary approach at least in terms of G, and maybe the fun-factor too?
  1. Cleaner (10G) You fought 5 enemies at once and none of them survived 
  2. Dunwall in Chaos (50G) You completed the game in high chaos (S) 
  3. Razor Rain (10G) You killed 5 characters with Drop Assassination 
  4. Rogue (10G) You assassinated 10 unaware enemies
Category III: Achievements you have to actively unlock
These are the ones you will need to actively work towards unlocked, which means in theory they are missable.  There are 28 in total, worth 420G.
  1. Alive Without Breath (10G) You took possession of a fish (S)
  2. An Unfortunate Accident (10G) You killed Morgan Pendleton with steam (S)
  3. Art Dealer (50G) You collected all the Sokolov paintings
  4. The Art of the Steal (10G) You got the Art Dealer's safe combination for Slackjaw, but robbed the safe first (S)
  5. Back Home (10G) You grabbed a live grenade and threw it back, killing an attacker
  6. Big Boy (20G) You killed a tallboy using only your sword
  7. Bodyguard (10G) You protected Callista's uncle, Captain Geoff Curnow (S)
  8. Creepy Crawly (10G) You used a rat tunnel (S)
  9. The Escapist (10G) After Coldridge Prison, you eluded 5 pursuers at once without killing them or leaving the map
  10. Food Chain (10G) You assassinated an assassin (S)
  11. Gentleman Caller (10G) You completed all the Granny Rags side missions (S)
  12. Harm's Way (10G) You caused 5 unintentional suicides
  13. Hornets' Nest (20G) You killed 4 enemies in less than 1 second using the crossbow
  14. Inhabitant (10G) You stayed in possession of others for most of a 3 minute period
  15. King of the World (10G) You reached the top of Kaldwin's Bridge (S)
  16. Lights Out (10G) You deactivated at least 5 security systems on Kingsparrow Island (S)
  17. Manipulator (10G) You made others kill 5 of their own allies
  18. Merchant of Disorder (20G) You acquired 15 equipment upgrades
  19. Mercy is the Mark (10G) You spared Daud’s life (S)
  20. Mostly Flesh and Steel (50G) You finished the game without purchasing any supernatural powers or enhancements, besides Blink
  21. Speed of Darkness (10G) You traveled 30 meters in less than 1 second
  22. Street Conspiracy (10G) You completed all the Slackjaw side missions (S)
  23. Tempest (20G) You killed 6 enemies in less than 1 second
  24. Thief (20G) You pickpocketed items worth a total of 200 coins
  25. This Is Mine (10G) You recovered your belongings
  26. Versatile (20G) You killed characters with each weapon and offensive gadget
  27. Wall of Sparks (10G) You killed an enemy with the Wall of Light
  28. Well Mannered (10G) You completed the Boyle Estate mission without spoiling the party (S)
Category IV: Automatic (Story-Based) and the like
These are basically automatic Achievements unlocked as a natural consequence of playing through the story, so they apply to both styles of play.  There are 8 in total, worth 170G.
  1. Capturing Genius and Madness (10G) You abducted Anton Sokolov, Royal Physician
  2. Child Care (10G) You located Lady Emily Kaldwin, heir to the throne
  3. Dishonored (5G) You escaped Coldridge Prison
  4. Excommunication (5G) You eliminated High Overseer Campbell
  5. Long Live the Empress (10G) You saved Empress Emily Kaldwin (S)
  6. Occultist (20G) You collected 10 bone charms
  7. Regicide (10G) You assassinated the Lord Regent, Hiram Burrows
  8. Resolution (100G) You completed the game
Category V: Optional DLC Achievements
These are unlocking inside the two DLC expansions for the game - note that to obtain these you will need to spend money (well, Microsoft Points on Xbox Live anyway).  If you did not pay for these, and then download them, you cannot unlock them!
  1. Assassin Vs. Machine (15G) Complete Train Runner before the train arrives at the station*
  2. By My Hand Alone (15G) Get to Wave 13 in Back Alley Brawl killing all combatants personally*
  3. Cleaner Hands (40G) Complete The Knife of Dunwall without killing anyone**
  4. Daredevil (15G) In Bonfires, perform all the special combination jumps in 1 round*
  5. Headhunter (15G) Complete Assassin's Run with 100% accuracy using only head shots*
  6. Just Business (15G) You got the information you needed from the Rothwild Slaughterhouse**
  7. Long Way Down (15G) Perform a drop assassination of at least 150 meters in the Kill Cascade challenge*
  8. Message from the Empress (10G) You performed a drop assassination from atop the Empress statue in The Knife of Dunwall** (S)
  9. Missing Pieces (15G) You obtained Delilah Copperspoon's identity from Thalia Timsh** (S)
  10. Mrs Pilsen's Remorse (30G) Find Emily's doll hidden in each of the 10 challenges*
  11. Natural Talent (15G) Finish Mystery Foe without using any active supernatural powers*
  12. No Regrets (35G) Complete The Knife of Dunwall in High Chaos**
  13. Rare Collector (15G) Find all of the collectable figurines in Burglar on Expert*
  14. Rats and Ashes (10G) Attach an arc mine to a rat, resulting in a kill**
  15. Redemptive Path (35G) Complete The Knife of Dunwall in Low Chaos**
  16. Stone Cold Heart (10G) You spoke with the statue of Delilah in Timsh's estate** (S)
  17. Time Management (15G) Finish Chain Kill or Bend Time Massacre without failing any wave, including bonuses*
  18. Void Star (50G) Complete all Normal and Expert challenges with a 3-Stars rating*
  19. Well Connected (10G) Purchase all of the Favors in The Knife of Dunwall**
  20. Whisper Ways (40G) Complete The Knife of Dunwall without alerting anyone**
(S) Secret Achievement.
* DLC: Dunwall City Trials (10 Achievements worth 200G)
** DLC: The Knife of Dunwall (10 Achievements worth 220G)

The image embedded above is from the Trials DLC - if there is any question in your mind as to whether paying for the DLC for this game is worth it, well, yeah, it is worth it.  Big time!

Hindsight is Not Always 20/20

My first exposure to Dishonored was a bit unusual in that unlike almost all of the other AAA titles for console that released in 2012/2013, for some reason I was not on the press release and PR list for it, so my first experience was at last year's E3 (2012).

After we sat through the presentation for Dishonored I remember thinking three things:

(1) It looks like a Steampunk approach to the stealth-shooter genre;

(2) It is being developed by Arkane, and they made the new Batman series, so it is going to be a well-built, graphically sound, and very impressive tight story;

(3) I am probably not going to like it.

So yeah, it very much is a steam-punk-influenced title, and yes indeed it was made by the same studio that made the new Batman series, which means it is very tight in the story, well built, and has very pleasing graphics as well as effective use of game mechanics (which is not always the case when a game combines traditional swords and sorcery with the shooter-fusion-genres).  Ah, but as far as number three is concerned, I got it wrong.

It turns out that I liked it a LOT.  Well, there you go - cannot be right all the time, right?

If you are interested, Dishonored was one of only a handful of games that actually earned a perfect score in its review - you can read my review of Dishonored here -  and I should note that in addition to scoring high, Dishonored also happens to be an economical game (due largely to its high replay potential and score) coming in at an average admission cost of just .74 cents an hour, which is really good for a modern shooter.  Just saying.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

. . . the Organized Internet Life?

A minor blip that caused the disconnection of my always-on Internet connection at home prompted me to do something that I have not done in a very long time: think about my Internet connection.

Seriously.

My connection to the Internet is such that I hardly ever actually think about it because it works the way it is supposed to; the result of that is that I don't need to think about it.  When it briefly did not work the way it was supposed to - and I have no idea why that happened due mostly to the fact that right about the time I was logging in to my firewall to check the connection log to see if there was a useful bit of information about the reason that it dropped its connection, the connection came back up and I was back online.  That being the case, why bother trying to diagnose the cause, right?

Except I was already thinking about my Internet connection at this point, and that little voice in the back of my head that usually gets me into trouble was not-too-calmly yelling to get my attention, before it rudely pointed out to me that the rack full of hardware in my basement that represents my connection to the world was about to celebrate its tenth birthday...

Fifteen Years or so in the past, on a Cold Dark Night
I am not exaggerating when I say that the last time that I dealt with the infrastructure for our network connection and Internet capabilities was fully ten years ago.  Well, with the exception of the WiFi Router that I added slightly less than five years ago, but still...

To fully appreciate the situation we actually have to jump into the Wayback Machine and travel back to the month of November, in the year 1997, which was the time when I actually deployed the computer network that we still use here at Chez Boots-Faubert.  This is ancient history; these are events that took place back before I lost my mobility and could still walk.  This was back when I had worked with my best friend to plan out the most efficient and secure Ethernet network that we could manage at the time, using the cutting-edge tech from the previous century!

The view of my backyard taken on the same late-afternoon day of the great Ethernet Deployment Event, this is what the world outside looked like...
While a blustery day was coming to a close and an equally blustery evening was setting in, the inhabitants of Chez Boots-Faubert were in the process of doing their best to fulfill the roles that nature had forced upon them by circumstance and necessity.  

If we embrace the comforting formality of taxonomy, the population at those coordinates in the time-space continuum consisted of a family grouping of four Homo sapiens who are known by the unique identifying sounds that form the names Chris, Yvonne, Peter, and Autumn, and who were joined by a very close friend -- who answered to the grouping of sounds that follow the verbal pattern Geo-Fry -- and who is also a member of the species Home Sapiens and if not a blood relation than as close as one can be related to another without sharing the same genetic genealogy...

In addition to this grouping of generally homogenous humans of northern European stock, there was also present at this auspicious occasion a trio of Felis catus whose nyms were Nixie, Pixie, and Mischief, and who claimed the environs of the office and Domestic Network Hub (DNH) as a  physical domain of which they jointly ruled by force of will and snickity claws.  

It may interest you to learn that earlier in the day the human known as Yvonne effected the rescue of a sole member of the species Peromyscus maniculatus who was so unfortunate as to cross the path of the one known as "Nixie" who was, by all accounts, a fierce warrior of many claws, and who could be counted upon to defend the various territories to which he laid claim, either separately or jointly with his two brothers.

It is therefore rather remarkable that the one known as Yvonne was able not only to effect the rescue of the Peromyscus maniculatus, but due to circumstances that would require too much background to explain to our mutual satisfaction was also able to provide him with protective shelter in the form of a habitat of proper dimension and security design, equipped with all of the comforts one of that species might reasonably expect. Or even unreasonably expect.

These comforts included a 10oz bottle recently filled with fresh and cool supply of a life-giving liquid substance that is constructed from one oxygen and two hydrogen atoms connected by covalent bonds and obtained via a complex network of piping provided to the community as part of its cooperative efforts towards shared health and comfort, but that is the subject of another and completely unrelated story, and besides which that substance does not mix well with computer networks, I am just saying...

In addition to the aforementioned self-service bottle, the habitat was equipped with a feeding tray that was recently filled with Ground Corn, Soybean Meal, Wheat Mill Run, Alfalfa Hay Suncured, Ground Barley, Whole Corn, Oat Groats, Whole Wheat, Soybean Roasted, Sunflower Seed, Whole Kamut, Cane Molasses Dried, Apple Dried, Flax Seed (which happens to be an excellent source of Omega 3 Fatty Acids which make up a very important part of a proper diet for the typical example of a Peromyscus maniculatus), Yeast Culture, Cranberry Dehydrated, Salt, Sodium Bentonite, Sodium Phosphate, Lignin Sulfonate, Soybean Oil (which is preserved with Mixed Tocopherols, and anyone can tell you that Mixed Tocopherols is an excellent source for Vitamin E), Choline Chloride, Calcium Carbonate, L-Lysine, DL-Methionine, Yucca Schidigera Extract, Vitamin E Supplement, Zinc Sulfate, Iron Sulfate, Zinc Proteinate, Niacin, SeleniumYeast, Copper Sulfate, Biotin, Manganese Proteinate, Copper Proteinate, Calcium Pantothenate, Vitamin A Supplement, Sodium Selenite, Vitamin B2 Riboflavin, Vitamin B1 Thiamin Mononitrate, Magnesium Sulfate, Manganous Oxide, Vitamin B6, Pyridoxine HCl, Folic Acid, Cobalt Carbonate, Vitamin D3 Supplement, Vitamin B12 Supplement, Calcium Iodate, and Ethylenediamine Dihydroiodide.

 In addition to all of that there was an exercise wheel! 

It should be mentioned that this very well-equipped habitat was previously the home of an unusually long-lived member of the species Mus musculus whose name was "Gunther" but who had departed this mortal coil on a journey to the designated coordinates in the space-time continuum listed in the TARDIS NavCore as "The Rainbow Bridge."

As Gunther belonged to the species Mus musculus and was a particularly moral character among that species we feel that it can safely be presumed that his name was down in the book maintained by the 
maître d’hôtel in that place (for surely when one ponders the known facts, one can only conclude that a maître d’hôtel would be a bare necessity in a realm in which "There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable" it seems reasonable that some level of competent management must be present, n'est-ce pas?

The members of the family served by the newest Network to be created on planet earth are from left to right and front to back Yvonne, Autumn (seated in the most comfortable seat available when The Big Comfy Couch is not around) and Peter (on the right) pictured here in the rustic environment known as the Domestic Network Hub.

In any event that newest member of the family took up residence in the former home of Gunther, and was instantly granted the sobriquet of "Lucky" for obvious reasons.

It was therefore into this mixture of human and animal that the plan to bring forth a new Network on the face of the earth was hatched and quickly executed!

The Well-Designed Network
As a measure of how serious the project of properly building the Domestic Ethernet Network was, it can be understood and agreed that the design and its deployment included the most modern of Ethernet tech at the time...

While the physical network consisted of 10bT properly deployed to network base plates at the terminus for each drop, all of the wire funneled back to a patch panel installed in the relay rack that was itself installed beside the pair of industry-standard 19" Equipment Racks, with one rack dedicated to the hardware that served the internal network, while the second was dedicated to the hardware that existed within the DMZ for the network, providing the services for the public side of the connection which included but were not limited to a Primary DNS Server, an SMTP and POP3 Server, a Web Server, and a dedicated FTP Server.

On the inside rack was housed a pair of file servers - one for strictly business while the second was more of a media server than a file server in the sense that it had a large number of inexpensive hard drives as well as a 10-disc CD Tower and an Tuner Card that was installed in the server to allow the users on the network to use its dedicated web page to select the programs that they wanted it to record for their later viewing from its Cable TV link.  At the time that was pretty cutting-edge!

Pictured here is Chris in the process of connecting the 10bT drops to the patch panel.  On the right is the house rack.
Once all of the drops were connected to the patch panel, a pair of Kalpana 10bT Ethernet Switches were installed to the relay rack and then patched into the panel to create the network, with the final connection being made to the firewall and Internet Router.  At the time the network connection consisted of a mated pair of 128k ISDN lines, offering a combined speed of 256k which was the best connection that could be obtained in that era.  Considering that the average user in 1997 still connected to the Internet via a 28.8k modem, this was pretty darn fast for a household 'net connection!

About ten years ago DSL finally became available on the Cape and it was at that point that the second to last major update to the Network was made.  The paired ISDN was replaced with a DSL connection that offers something in the neighborhood of 3MB...

Three years ago when one of the ancient Kalpana 10bT Ethernet Switches died on us, forcing us to move all of our connections to the second Kalpana and divide the physical switch into two virtual switches, we realized that something had to be done, so when the next MIT Flea took place (the MIT Flea takes place in the parking garage at MIT on the 3rd Sunday of the month, April thru October and if you have never been you should go, it is really an experience).

So we drove in to Cambridge and bought a pair of softly-used 3Com SuperStack III Gigabit Ethernet Switches to replace the Kalpana, and that is where the situation stands.  Well, that and five or so years ago we added WiFi to the mix because the kids complained a lot about how their iPads and iPhones, needed to be able to connect to the online world...


What Will Be New Will Be New?
So this tiny blip on the radar of our personal connection to the Internet naturally set me to thinking about the fact that the infrastructure of our domestic network is essentially a mixture of different hardware that ranges in age from 5 to 15 years old!  Clearly it is time to seriously consider updating the network, right?  Right!

Going completely wireless is not an option.  Forget for the moment that some of the devices that we use - the IP-based security cameras for example - get their power from the network, there is also the question of security.  It is one thing to create a WiFi connection on an isolated virtual switch so that your kids and surf the world on their iDevices, but it is entirely another matter to declare wireless as a secure standard and connect your life to the world in that fashion.  Just saying.

So the network will remain wired.  But since we already ran the physical wire drops that works out fine.

Having said that though, there is still a need for WiFi and it is getting bigger not smaller!  The iDevices that originally prompted adding a WiFi point of presence to the net have now been joined by wireless phones in general, plus handheld gaming consoles like the Nintendo DS and 3DS, Sony's PSP and Vita, and to a limited degree the traditional consoles themselves, though personally I find that the wired connection for our Xbox360 consoles is still the faster and more reliable way to go...

Sony's PS3 offers built-in wireless (so does the 360) but this is 2013, the year that Microsoft and Sony will be introducing their next gen game consoles, and until we see what direction they are going to take for those, there is no point even speculating, is there?

In this day and age each human user requires accessibility for the following devices at a minimum:
  • Wireless Phone data connectivity
  • Media device (iPad/iPhone basically)
  • Traditional Game Console(s)
  • Portable Game Console(s)
  • Laptop/Notebook Computer
  • Desktop Computer
While that covers the typical human we still need to have full support for the following devices:
  • File Server
  • Media Server
  • Shared Network Printer
  • IP-based security cams
  • Internet-Connected and Skype-enabled TV's
  • Internet-connected Cable DVR
And all of that means that in addition to replacing the ancient WiFi switch it is time to replace the Ethernet Switches, but with what?  

There is no easy answer off-the-cuff, but then this is just the opening act in what will, I am sure, turn out to be a long series on upgrading the network.  

If you think about it the fact that we already have all these devices that each have their own connection requirements makes this whole process even more complicated than it would be if we simply chucked everything out and started from scratch!

I bet this guy could quickly solve the WiFi speed issues on our network...

WiFi Weak?
When we first installed a WiFi router on the network it was mostly used by the kids to download songs from iTunes and games for their DS's - activities that while I am sure they used the available bandwidth when they were doing them never really presented an issue when it came to available bandwidth...  

So you can probably imagine my surprise when I started to hear complaints from the kids about how the "net was so slow" all the time.  I could not see the slowness that they were talking about - it seemed fine to me - but then I was using computers and game consoles that were connected to the network via wires, and they were using their preferred devices on the WiFi side of the network.

I could not imagine how a pair of teenagers using iPads and the like could possible be using that connection to the point that they actually impacted the quality of speed for each other, so I assumed that it was something else - some other radio-based device must be stepping on the channel that the WiFi was using, right?

Naturally I logged into the Admin interface and changed the channel that the WiFi used, and told them I had "fixed" the problem.  Except that the next bored period when they were both using YouTube and Hulu and all of the other bandwidth intensive apps that they used, they again complained about the speed.

Once the complaining reached a fevered pitch I asked my daughter to show me the problem, and low and behold it turned out that they were not imagining things!  As we sat and she tried to watch Netflix on her iPad while her brother was using YouTube and playing Minecraft with one of this mates the TV show that she was watching would sputter and pause while it was forced to re-cache.

'This should not be happening" was my first thought.  But as it turned out when I did a little research into the matter, yes, yes it should.  While both of the kids would likely not have noticed anything if they were using their computers and portable media devices to do things like email, web surf, and the like, once you introduce bandwidth-intensive activities like Netflix and Hulu, and online games with high network activity (a lot of the war games that my son plays qualify in that regard) you are now sharing a limited amount of bandwidth.

What I ended up doing was switching my son's Xbox to a wired connection, and that pretty much solved the problem for the most part, giving my daughter's iPad sole access to the wireless pipe that it clearly needed, but considering how many devices today are being made with WiFi as the preferred connectivity (think portable devices) it is clear to me that WiFi on your home network can no longer be a side-thought.  You have to plan your network with WiFi in mind if you are going to deliver the sort of user satisfaction that teenagers have come to expect :)

Short of outlawing Netflix, Hulu, YouTube and other video services (I could do that, it is just a few lines added to the filter on the firewall) it is clear to me that it is time to rethink the models that we have been using to plan out network capacity today.

Just where is Mr. Wizard when we need him?!

Time to Dust Off the Thinking Cap
As nice as it would be if there was a simple answer to the problem, there isn't.  So this post is not going to conclude with a neat solution, other than to remind me that it is time to start researching the current tech and to begin looking for a usable solution to the problem - but on the bright side, at least I know what the problem is!

As for the rest, I will have to get back you on that...